Monday 1st June 2026

Mondays.

Last week I had volunteered my services to assist in an "introduction to orchids" day at Monkton Nature Reserve for KWT.

Only its also one of Jools' busiest day, with her friend, Twiggy (not that one) coming over to do some admin. Normally I would take the car, but Jools would have to drop me off, and I be stuck there until she came to collect me at three or four.

And again, my brain wakes me up during a dream in which a friend is being attacked by pirates for not building a set of steps on a footpath correctly.

Best out of that dream!

My legs were stiff from the steps on Sunday, so I thought little of that. I mean, how much walking could there be?

So we left at nine, after rush hour, I drove us to the Sandwich Road, then across the marshes through Preston and out through Stourmouth. It is more direct, and would avoid any traffic on Thanet.

That's my excuse for going the scenic slow way.

I arrive a few minutes early, but people are already arriving

I take a seat and keep myself to myself, until we were called into the café, as the lecture/discovery Buckyball had suffered an IT failure.

The director, Clive, did introductions, then presented me as something of the orchid expert.

Ahem.

So, Clive delved into his presentation on what an orchid is, and how they reproduce and an overview on the main species.

I chip in with comments/corrections, but not many.

After an hour we go into the reserve, walking round the lower level, looking and them trying to ID orchids.

We amble round, and I take questions from the dozen or so people on the course. Its a day with hazy cloud, but warmer than expected, and no rain came. I did, at least, remember to bring a hat, so kept the sun off.

I hadn't read the mail from Clive properly, so failed to bring a lunch, but there were chocolate hobnobs to graze on.

We went back out, and this time to the steps to the upper level and found some open Bee, as well as dozens for man and Twayblade. Views over the reserve were spectacular.

Back down for a presentation on propagation of new orchids for the site, I tried to show some pictures I I brought on a memory stick, but Clive's Apple Mac kept crashing and I had to give up on the 4th attempt.

And we were done.

I walked up to the entrance at quarter to four, to find Jools had just arrived, so I climbed in and she drove us back home in the warm afternoon sunshine.

Dinner was leftover pizza and quiche. And beer. All done in ten minutes and wolfed down quickly.

My legs ached and stiffened up now I wasn't walking, would I go to the gym in the morning?

No football to watch again, so I watched stuff on that YouTube and was in bed for nine.

Sunday 31st May 2026

Sunday. And I had friends coming down from Gloucestershire.

For orchids.

Obviously.

The temptation was to scrub phys, but Jools said, correctly, we should still go.

Up at half five, with enough time to feed the cats, test and jab Scully, make and drink coffee. And be ready to rock and roll come ten to seven.

Sundays are always quiet at the sports centre, at least at seven, and most who are there when it opens are going swimming.

We go upstairs to the gym, where there is just one guy in, doing weights. So we climb on the bike and get going.

At least there was The Parallel Universe to listen to, with Marc and Beverly Bob to listen to, from 1986. Or reading from an edition of Sounds from 1986.

Time flew, even though I was hot, and there was enough unplayed to fill Tuesday morning' work out as well.

Yay.

Back home for a brew, then off to Folkestone Services to meet Duncan and his mate, Andrew, for the first of several site visits.

I had enough time to have breakfast of a bacon and egg sarnie and a bottle of banana milkshake, then go outside to wait for them to arrive.

We go to a site where there was much to see. The long walk up the down was filled with Bee orchids just opening, and the occasional butterfly fluttering by.

We reached the site, and filled our boots with two species of orchids, rare variants and hybrids.

What to do with the rest of the day?

I mention Monkton Nature Reserve, and their nearly one thousand spikes of Man orchids. Yellow Man orchids.

It was agreed and we set off across the county, through Barham, Wingham and Preston, avoiding the main roads, until we reach the reserve. And there was plenty of parking too.

They were expecting a small roadside reserve, not a five hectare former quarry with nearly a dozen potential orchid species.

We spent a good two hours wandering around, and they delighted in the yellow Man. We also found a couple of Chalk Fragrant just opening, as well as SMO and CSO.

We stop for a cuppa and some shortbread, catching our breath before the short drive to Cliffsend and their desire to see the white SMO twins.

A cuckoo called from a distance, as we walked over the main road and into the reserve. We cut into the thick vegetation, and I find the two spikes straight away.

But the spikes were already browning off from the bottom of the spikes, a shame, but in these dry conditions, it is to be expected.

Another two minute drive away was Monk's Wall, and after parking I show them the Broomrape and Lizards beside the path, then we cross to the central reservation, where Duncan counted 72 Lizards in under a hundred metres, and many lacking most pigmentation.

I take a shot of them searching the central reservation, before we move on to the final destination.

Which was Sandwich Bay.

Sandwich Bay has usually been the mother lode of Lizards, not only in Kent, but in the UK. But two years of drought have wrought havoc on the site. Last year the hundreds of Lizards were in their tens, and most very small.

Which is when I went to the bypass to snap them, as some more water must have been thrown up from the roads, so the spikes there were normal size. As they are again this year.

So, after arriving at the Observatory, we walk to the meadow, after checking there was no bird ringing going on, so we could look at the SMO and Marsh helleborines.

Of the former there were many, but small spikes in flower, but of the Marsh helleborines, there was no sign, even of to the west of England, some were in flower before the weekend.

Duncan and I walked over the golf course to The Strand to check on the broomrapes, but only found two spikes of Bredstraw that were not totally brown, just the top branch was showing its yellow colour.

Duncan lent down and sniffed. He could just make out the clover scent.

The day was done. It was half five. The shadows lengthening, and they had to get to Gillingham to their hotel, and they were planning on going to Blean for some Heath fritillary action.

I sat and ate the Magnum Duncan had kindly bought, sent two messages to friends, then walked to the car, having done over 21,000 steps in the day, and drove home.

Back through Deal and Walmer, a brass band packing their instruments away at Walmer Bandstand, through the town, out into the countryside to home.

Back home at six, we were both hungry. So, I cook two lots of chicken, some baby new potatoes and do some salad. So in half an hour we sit down to quite the feast, but neither of us had eaten since breakfast.

A quiet evening. A shower and shave, then to bed at half nine, and slept like a log.

That snored.

Le Grand Départ

Good afternoon, friends, Romans, citizens of the Asylum.

In a little over six weeks we leave on the big vacance de jour. Cats will be rounded up, the car will be serviced, and the camera battery will be charged.

Again, instead of flying, we will be driving through France, to another country. But this time we are driving south and east to meet up with another orchid tour, spending a week on that, then driving through France, over the Pyrenees into Spain for the eclipse on August 12th.

Our route will take us from Dover to the Channel Tunnel, then onto Amiens.

Day two will take us from Amiens to Chalon-sur-Saône, where we will stay for a day or two. Before driving to Essoyes, where again we will stay for a day or two.

Next leg will take us to St Julien de Chivry, where once more we will stay, sample the food, wine and culture. And then onto the final layover at Villefranche-sur-Saône.

And then drive to Lyon Airport to meet with the tour, before travelling into he Alps for some orchid action for a week.

Once the tour is over, we have a short leg to Freissinières, where we stay for a night, and then on to Arles, where we will soak up yet more food, wine and culture.

Next up is Beziers, where I have been before, but only for a couple of hours, so we will stay a couple of nights, and might go out and about to familiar places.

Then across the mountains into Spain for a couple of nights in Burgos, during which time we hope to see the eclipse.

We then have three days to drive back to Calais, which is ambitious.

Some might like to study maps of the route of our own Le Tour! We even checked the other Le Tour's calandar to make sure we don't get too close. Not that I'd mind, but one year we will go to see Le Tour, but not this year.

Anyway, hope you find this interesting.

And exciting.

Saturday 30th May 2026

This is Saturday, Watch and Smile.

TISWAS.

Only the Phantom Flanflinger and Spit the Dog didn't have to go to the gym at seven in the morning. Then I don't either, but I do.

No slacking for this gym rat.

Up at half five, coffee made and drunk, then off to Whitfield for my usual session, listening to The Bugle.

Hello Buglers!

And back home before eight, and go along the street to check on the Bee Orchid. Not an Early Spider, as if it was, it would have flowered six weeks ago.

I have made the walk up the street each morning for a week, and each day the spike got a little longer, the flower head formed, then on Thursday the green of the flower had a white colour. On Friday it was pink.

So was close.

And on Saturday the Bee was open, the sepals bright pinky-purple. I grinned as I alays do when I see a Bee Orchid.

I take the sign to re-write it now the orchid has been identified and has flowered.

Later I go to the owners, and instead of coming with me to see the orchid, I was asked to go round the back.

In a broken plant pot was not one, but two Bee Orchid spikes, both a couple of days from flowering!

I thought they looked the same as the one out front, he says.

Indeed they are.

I walk back home, smiling. And go for a shower.

Lovely.

They day is hot, not as hot as earlier in the week, but still too warm to sit on the patio until the shade covers the seat.

There is football.

Then there always is. Scotland played their last home game before flying out for the US for the World Cup: they win 4-1.

Then at five the Champion's League final. Arsenal v PSG. The best attack v the best defence.

Arsenal scored in the 6th minute. And that was the only shot they had on goal in the 120 minutes of the game. PSG never really threatened Arsenal, but won a penalty in the 2nd half, and scored.

1-1 after 90 minutes. And no goals in extra time either.

So penalties. Arsenal miss two, PSG just one. So, so near and yet so far.

And yet PSG really had no answer to Arsenal's defence, until that penalty. But Arsenal were defending their lead, not attacking, so one goal was never going to be enough.

Sportswashing won out again.

Friday 29th May 2026

And its Friday, and so we're on the cusp of the weekend. Again.

I like Fridays, I can lay in and sleep. But as always, almost always, my brain woke me at twenty past five.

It was cool, but the sun was already lighting the window of the side bedroom. It was going to be another scorcher, though with a possibility of rain.

Which would have been nice, though in the end it amounted to about ten drops of rain, so the garden remained dry.

Jools was up and about, and off to yoga at ten past six. I could barely string a coherent sentence together at that hour.

I do accept coffee though.

So once I had woken up, I put out the bins, then go and sit on the patio with Scully, until the heat from the still low sun drove me back to the cool interior of the house.

The parasol would cast a cool shadow over the bench seat from just before midday, so would go back out then.

I checked on the Bee orchid spike. Still not open, but the first flower bud was now pink rather than white.

Maybe tomorrow.....

Jools came home, and after a brew and a cream scone, I announce, grandly, that I was going to go out orchiding.

Jools said it was too hot, so I went on me tod.

I drove along the Sandwich road past Sandwich, up through Richborough, then turn off towards Pegwell Bay.

We have been coming here for over a decade. Sometimes a cuckoo would be calling, though rarely seen. But not this year.

Into the reserve, I find the ground either side of the path overgrown, and at first no orchids were seen.

Further on I see a couple: a pure Southern Marsh, and a couple of tiny Common Spotted, and then the taller spikes of their bastard offspring, Dactylorhiza x grandis.

After some searching, and finding two small Pyramidal spikes in partial flower hidden in deep vegetation.

I went to the area I knew where the densest population usually were to be found, and find several spikes of both species, hybrids, but best of all, a double spike of pure white Southern Marsh. Only the third time I have seen this colour form, and a twin spike!

A short drive away is Monk's Wall, and the colony of Lizards along the side of the bypass.

I park up, walk up the slope, and find that the Lizards are at or close to their peak.

Large, majestic spikes, some green with pink edges, other pale green, almost var. flavescens.

I snap them, then cross over to the central reservation to snap more. On the way I stumble across a lone Bee orchid.

Unexpected Bee Orchid in the bagging area!

I don't think there's another orchid that causes such a reaction as a Bee, so I let out a squeal of delight and snap that too.

I had to drive through Sandwich, and along the narrow streets so to avoid the traffic jam on the bypass, which is mad. But passing folks sitting outside pubs, sipping ice cold beer made me thirsty. Soon, Ian. Soon.

My last stop was where, a few years ago, was a large colony of Bee Orchids, including some yellow ones. Sadly, the site has been developed, and the sides of the road now landscaped and the Bees gone.

But Viper's bugloss is taking over, with its large blue and purple spikes in flower in huge numbers. I walk up and down both verges, but see no Bees, but do find a Cudweed species for the first time.

And that was that.

Back in the car and through Deal, Walmer and back home. I thought the towns would be packed, but there was some parking spaces, but I don't stop, instead I think of the cold beer I would soon be supping.

I quickly made one bottle of La Chouffe Cherry vanish along with some peanuts, and with the second bottle we finished of the French garlic flavoured crisps I bought at Stop 24 services, before I saw they were £4.50 a bag.

I spend the afternoon listening to all 19 tracks off London Calling, sometimes singing along. There are worse ways to spend the afternoon.

And I live by the river!

They were nice, though.

I win the music quiz. On the first clue, correctly guessing that it was Bandwagonesque by Teenage Fanclub. Ten points to Jelltex, but I am unplaced in the month's final standings.

Time to change, have a wash before going out again to meet Ange and Sean at Chef de Mumbai for a curry, beers and a chat.

All of the above was wonderful, we ate slowly, but well. And I made three pints of Cobra disappear.

Lovely.

Jools drove us home in the gloaming, as the sun set angry and red to the north west, made so by the desert dust in the atmosphere.

A bloody good day.

Thursday 28th May 2026

Overnight, the wind dropped and the temperature climbed, as did the humidity.

Sleep was hard to come by.

So, by five I was tired, and it was supposed to be a phys day.

Truth is I haven't done a full 40 minutes in a couple of weeks, and I know I would have to this day. It would have been all too easy to bail, but Jools was going, so I went too.

We were five minutes behind, the doors to the entrance had already been opened as we drove into the car park. So we parked, walked to the swishy doors, and in.

Up the stairs and we find just one other person in the gym, so we take the two bikes, and get working out.

In the corner, where the bikes are, the air con isn't good, so soon I was hot and bothered, but apart from being uncomfortable, I was fine, just had to get through the urge to give up because hot and sweaty.

I did the forty minutes. Jools did her stuff, so back to the car and round to Tesco, where filling the car now costs seventy quid.

Thanks Donald, yer bampot.

Then into the shop where we spend another hundred or so quid on stuff we need.

And then we forgot. I forgot., the tortilla chips and sour cream, yet remembered the coriander.

I can't explain it.

Back home for breakfast of mini pork pies, and put the shopping away. Before I was out again, this time to Monkton Nature Reserve.

I arrived dead on ten, and ask for the director, who is pleased to see me.

Ahem.

And after some orchid chit-chat, we go into the reserve and see what the tour next week will see.

And hour past, and we saw mostly var. flavescens Man orchids, so I took shots as we walked and talked.

I showed him the rosettes and spikes of Pyramidals he thought had failed, and he showed me the Lizard orchid spikes, one of which should flower this year.

He had meetings, and I was done, so we shook hands, not before me offering to do a talk on Monday at a KWT orchid day, so no pressure then to perform my talk on Kent orchids.

I drove slowly back, through Wingham to Barham, then onto the A2 and back home.

The morning had gone.

I had a couple of hours before I was due out again, this time to Dover for a dental appointment.

I parked at Stenbrook, but the peace was shattered by the fair that had Eurodisco and whatever the latest bland trend is.

One kid lay on the grass, his mother trying to bring him round. A combination of heat, excitement and too much sugar I suspect.

Inside the dentist, the guy before me was having major work done on an infection, and his twenty minute appointment stretched to ninety.

I waited, and at regular intervals added time for parking via the app.

I went up. Teeth fine, other than me brushing too hard still.

But not as bad as could be, is damning with faint praise, I guess.

Back home for ten past five. The cats fed, so I cook a quick supper of sausage sarnies with onion and ketchup.

Took 15 minutes and was perfect.

And that was your day. My day. Some orchids and another day without work.

Wednesday 27th May 2026

Mum would have been 82.

Checking the moth trap is easier on days when we don't go to the gym.

As on Tuesday I forgot until we got back from Phys, and the poor moths were baking in the sun.

So set again on Tuesday night, so that when we got up at half five, I could check the trap.

I could see several of the moths were members of the Pug family, and the most handsome was a Green pug, which I delighted in it's patterning.

After checking all moths, we put the trap and fittings in the shade, so they could fly off when they wanted.

We went back inside to check Scully and feed the rest of the cats.

It was some ten degrees cooler, and there was a fresh breeze that made it feel almost comfortable.

We had nothing planned, other than Jools's class, so she left at half seven, while I washed up and faffed around.

I sit in the back garden on the top patio looking for birds and insects. A couple of Painted ladies were about, but when one settled, I didn't have my camera, so we just stared at each other until I moved and it flew off.

And not much of any import happened.

The morning passed into afternoon. Jools brought back a lady from the group to do some admin online with, so I was back outside, out of the way for a few hours.

Until I had to go to Canterbury or an osteopath appointment, as I am getting a slight pain in my right foot.

So, a gentle drive along the A2, then turn off onto New Dover Road, and halfway along is their practice.

I am seen, and it all boils down to the injury I had two years ago in my knee, a torn cartilage, and how my body adapted and put strain elsewhere.

So, I was prodded and pummelled, and given exercises to do, so paid and drove back home.

We dined on steak, chippy chips, garlic mushrooms and fresh asparagus. All delicious and washed down with pink fizz.

And for the evening there was European football. Crystal Palace wone the Europa Conference, 1-0. And that was that.

Just the Champion's League Final on Saturday and the season ends. Until the World Cup begins in two and a half weeks.