50 not out

Today I am 50. Or I will be at twenty to eight this evening. Born right in the middle of an episode of Top of the Pops. Not that Mum was watching it, she was at the sanitarium in Great Yarmouth, as all the other local hospitals were full, something to do with the baby boom or something.

Growing up in Oulton Broad, my birthday sometimes fell across the Bank Holiday weekend, and back then they had the Red Arrows flying as part of the local regatta. Obviously, the Red Arrows only came to celebrate my birthday. Of course. My birthday also meant that the endless summer holiday was drawing to an end, and sometime next week or the week after we would have to return to schools for another nine months of teachers trying to fit stuff into my head. Whilst i filled it with other stuff, mostly dreams, but occasionally Dr Who, Dad's Army or Survivors. It really did fill my thoughts for years, Tony. I spent days imagining what it would be like to be alone after most of the people had vanished!

And then the years began to pass ever more quickly: for my 15th, my parents arranged a party at a school where Mum worked, all soft drinks, crisps and pop music. Clean, sparkly days. Not sure about 16, but I am sure that for 18 I went out with friends so we could legally drink in pubs. Not that that had stopped us before hand, but now we could prove that we could buy a beer.

For 21 my friend Simon came round and, these days it would be called ironic, but we had a party with sandwiches, sausages on sticks, trifle as well as a cake, and on the cake were Subutteo figures enacting Noriwch scoring a goal against the old enemy. As you do. Just before joining the RAF, I took my parents out for a meal, to a posh place we used to like in South Lowestoft. They made me buy wine and three courses, but it was great and made me feel all grown up. If for a few hours anyway.

Certainly the first couple of birthdays in the mob involved beer, and lots of it. I seem to remember, of very blurred, drinking snakebites made from Special Brew and scrumpy and then laced with double vodkas at Marham in 1991. That I cannot remember that night, except for a few fragments is probably for the best.

During my time in the RAF, I spent my birthday in Vegas in 1999, it was two weeks into the det, and after 14 twenty hour days of working and drinking, we broke, and we fell asleep in Club Rio before nine in the evening on the day itself. Man, that hurt.

This is my account of my 40th spent in Vegas, that also hurt!

So, I turn 40 today; and I wanted this to be as memorable as possible. I thought it would be great to go to The Hilton to visit the Star Trek experience. They have a replica of Quarks bar, and that is where we were going to have breakfast. We caught the monorail that runs from the MGM all the way to the Hilton. The food in Quarks was very good, and the guys I think were impressed with the surroundings. Later Cheryl and I went on the two motion rides that were on offer; both were very good, the second one was in 3D. In the meantime, Jason had won a $100 on the slots, and was very happy.

We made our way on the monorail down to the Flamingo. We walked through that casino and across Las Vegas Boulevard to Caesars Palace.

We wandered around Caesars making our way to the Forum Shops. I wanted to show them the moving fountains, and from there to the largest toy shop in the world, CFO Shwartz. The mall had the feature of a painted ceiling that looked like a blue sky; and was very effective. There was a crowd around the fountain when we arrived just before four. The lights dimmed, and the animatronic statues came to life, and told a version of the Atlantis story; along with pyrotechnics and large video screens. Afterwards, we went to a place called the cheesecake factory for something to eat; and we sat people watching as we ate.

The toy shop is just is few yards further on, and is dominated by a huge wooden horse over 100 feet tall. The ground floor is full of plush animals, and each of the three other floors is full of wonderful things. After all this walking and window shopping, we were a little fatigued; so we decided to head back to our hotel room to freshen up before heading out for the night. Back at the MGM, I thought I would go and find a restaurant I had eaten in before, as we wanted to do something special that night. I left Jason and Cheryl to go up to the room, while I headed back into the heat and crowds on the strip. I found the place, the Beachwood Grill, and booked a table for half eight.

Dinner was fantastic, and I think it’s fair to say, I made the right choice in going there. I had also been to a specialist cigar shop to get a couple of cigars for the evening for Jason and me. After having a couple of nice malts in the MGM, and then we headed back to New York New York to go back to the Bar At Times Square. It was even more hedonistic than last night. The show ended at two, but we heard the sound of a band in the Irish bar opposite; we headed there, Jason and I leaving cigar smoke trails in our wake. The band was a rock one, and they played all favourites which went down with the crowd.

I had to go to the restroom, and I was walking across the casino floor I witnessed an assault. A guy leaped out on two black women walking along, and swung his fist into the face of one of the girls. I was shocked, but myself and others ran after the guy, and held him until security arrived. The women told security what happened, and then they changed their mind and dropped charges; which was odd. The security guy said he though it might have been an argument between a call girl and her client of a bad drug deal. Whatever the reason, the girls walked out into the night, and I had a story to tell the guys. We ended up at a bar back in the MGM at daybreak, having one last whiskey before heading up the lift to our 23rd floor room; and hopefully a dozen hours sleep.

The steaks were 32 ounces big, and the chips, salad came on different plates to the meat, as it overhung the one it was on.

And here we are, 50 and still going strong. Jools is due home in an hour and we will head to a country pub for lunch before visiting Nan. And this afternoon, meet friends for dinner in town. As you do.