The Play for Yesterday

I was reading a book today, and in it the author mentioned his school plays.

I was not much of a Thespian in my younger days, I loved TV too much, I have to say, and finding the night of the class play was going to clash with the final series of Dad's Army, I lied and made something up.

My first role was either as a raindrop or a ray of sunshine. I was 5 years old and all us in my class were dressed in paper tabbards with either a diagonal yellow strip on the front, or a tear shaped rain drop. IN the passing thirty eight or nine years, the name of the play or the plot has been forgotten. Needless to say, I was the star.

The next year I had my only speaking part, ever in a school play. In the story that was Noah and his Ark, I was Ham, Noah's son. And even to this day I remember my line. My only line. On hearing that two of every animal was to go into the ark, I had to utter the fillowing line:

"What about my hamster, Dad?"

And from then it was downhill. I don't know if that line brought the house down; it should have.

I think.

My last starring role was in the 4th year production of Robin Hood.

I was a tree.

A freaking tree.

The two of us being the forest.

Of Sherwood.

And I couldn't tie knots and so each day had to paint a new batch of leaves.

And on the big night missed my queue and walked on stage at the end of act three instead of the beginning of act 4.

From that point on, if you were a failure as a tree, what else could you do?

Be a giant.

In middle school, given the task to walk like a giant in drama class, imagine my surprise to be chosen to be the lead in a play of the Giant's Garden.

In front of the school.


I actually messed up kinda on purpose; how could being a failure as a tree prepare the young actor to be the lead? Not at all.

I messed up the dress rehearsal and was deputised. The performance never took place due to some reason. Oh well..