The end is nigh

If you missed it, on Monday I gave notice to my employer that I would be retiring at the end of Q1 next year.

We have been thinking about it for some time, of course, and the meeting with the advisor last week just cemented it.

There are many reasons for retiring, apart from the fact we can. But to sum it up, I amworn out, this has been a tough year, one that started well, ended well, but included a mini-breakdown in August, and my soon to be ex-boss of accusing me of insubordination.

As I said in a meeting, if I wanted to be insubordinate, there would be no doubt, rather to make some shit up that she did.

That manager was so well experienced, and should have been a great fit and come with new ideas. She did come with new ideas, but all of them hers and shit. We are unpicking her mistakes on a daily basis.

When I requested to move departments, HR focussed on my mental health instead. That was the meeting with the accusation of insubordination and "doxens of other examples".

In fact I use some of her improvement suggestions now, and they really do work, but that were a few tweaks here and there. She tried to fix something that wasn't broken, and when we said otherwise, we were either ignored or browbeaten.

And, all of us tried to point out where she was going wrong, and that no manager above her would even care if she was doinf 16 hour days and working all over weekend.

But she kept going.

Maybe it was the lack of sleep and being weary from work and family life, or a life spent battling to get where she did.

She is gone. We have a new manager who has so much other stuff to do, I have not spoken to him since mylast day in Aarhus two weeks back. But the fight has worn me out, and I don't want to fight any more.

There are other reasons at work, which I can't go into, but the knowledge is like huge weights I carry around. Its a huge responsibility, and for responsibility the company can't actually express in ways that would increase our pay or corporate level.

We do our job, and the machine goes on.

I called it a meat grinder, because it takes fresh meat in and crushes us, us people, and leave us broken. I spoke to two friends this week, onw of whom is medicating with wine, who are on the edge.



We are just collateral damage.

I feel we have won the game. Worked hard, served my country, saved, bought a house, paid it off, and now we get to do as we please. It sounds like winning to me.

No one has tried to talk me out of it, so far. And to do so, pay would have to pretty much double, and with other demands, that they could never meet, it aint gonna happen.

So, one more day before Christmas, then about sixy or so in the new year, and then, the rest of our lives.