Mum update

Its been a while.

I have the sad duty to report that Mum has sunk back into most of her old ways, apparently smoking excepted, although I wouldn't rule that out.

There was a period maybe at the end of February where she was being encouraged to go to a club twice a week, and was enthused about going out and doing stuff. So enthused she called us every day. Only I really couldn't care less. I mean I am glad she was doing it, but she had to do it because she wanted to do it, and do it for herself, not look for valediction from Jools and myself. And I told her this.

So, it might be my fault, but since her only friend did not like the club, Mum no longer goes. And apart from that has not been out of the house, so she is now back where she started, sitting in her armchair for 23 and a half hours a day.

And I really don't care. I am not going to go drive four hours up there and four hours back if she's not going to make an effort.

I refuse to be defined by my relationship with my Mother, not how her relationship with her own Mother was so fractured, and her Mother's to hers. And so on. I will break the cycle, be cruel to be kind and tell the truth how I sees it. Phone calls have gone from 20 minutes back to 3 minutes, and there are herds of elephants in the room once again.

It was always going to be thus, and if you ask me, two heart attacks, four stints, and open heart surgery aint gonna change her spots, no way.

Its the way it is, maybe being over four hours distant makes it easy. I don't know.