Saturday 26th February 2022

And back to the Kent church project.

I began the project in July 2009, so this is the 13th year. Many churches I have found open, others have been more problematic than others.

In the past it was Preston, Sturry, Hinxhill and Thannington Without that I tried to get into for years, but managed it either by arranging a visit or using Heritage Weekend. But through it all, one church remained defiant.

We first went to Barming one Good Friday, must have been 2011 or 21, and obviously, most had services. Barming was locked, and has remained so on every visit, maybe five or six over the last decade.

A friend managed to get inside a few weeks back, so he gave me the parish's e mail address, and I tried to make an appointment. The first one when we had the orchid management meeting last month, the church couldn't do. But when I suggested this weekend, a warden said she would open up for me.

So, a plan was hatched to visit four of the churches along the Medway, including Barming, and maybe get lucky elsewhere.

And the spring-like weather continued, Saturday dawning clear and bright, though chilly. But it would warm up quickly. We got up, had coffee and headed for Tesco, though we didn't need that much. We thought.

We rushed round and filled four bags with stuff, came back home and while Jools put the shopping away, I made bacon butties and a fresh brew. The bacon smelt delicious cooking, but tasted of nothing, a real disappointment.

But I was sure the rest of the day wouldn't be a disappointment.

I made sure we left leaving 90 minutes to get to the other side of Maidstone, should have been easy.

We cruised up to the M20, and all was going well. We cruised past Ashford, and into the Brexit contraflow, only for traffic to grind to a halt just after the west junction. No way to turn round.

eeeeek!

But there was just a van with a puncture, and we all allowed cars to merge and in ten minutes we were past and cruising again.

The choice was either to go through or round Maidstone. The town's one way system is dreadful, and a trip round the bypass, 270 degrees and many miles round the town is better than half the day spent in jams at traffic lights in the town centre.

We reached Mereworth, more of this later, and turned down the valley road, passing through Wateringbury, Teston and then to Barming.

Half an hour early.

But even this was good, as the churchyard had lots of wild flowers and the light in the spring sunshine and dew covered grass was wonderful. I made use of the time and rattled 50 shots off of the flowers and headstones.

I was sitting by the porch when Sue arrived, I waved and she came over, I said thanks for opening the church and appologised for disturbing her morning. She was very nice saying it was no trouble.

She undid the porch door, and then the inner door, and I was in.

In truth, like many things you anticipate for a long time, the reality isn't as good, but after reading John Vigar's description, the bench ends, made in 14th century Germany, was more that worth the effort.

I snap everything else, say thanks and put a tenner in the collection box.

A short drive away was Teston, where there is a Victorian church just above the main road.

I park and walk up, and inside a warden was cleaning and the good news was that she was very happy to let me snap as she worked. It took ten minutes or so, by which time she had finished too, so I said thanks and I walked back to the car, calling at the village shop for ice cream, of which they had none So I bought two bags of mini cheddars and we munched those on the short drive to Waterningbury.

The church there is on the main road, and was locked.

The plan was to call my friend and fellow orchidist, Ian, and he would come over and show us his local patch of Early Purples.

In the meantime, a warden came along and did open up, but I didn't ask if I could go in, he didn't seem to friendly and locked the door behind him. Anyway, Ian soon arrived and we set off to look for some orchids.

Not in flower, but not long now.

Up from the main road was a narrow lane, lined with huge mansions, one by some gentleman from the Middle East, had huge walls and two very aggressive German Shepherds at the gats who made it clear that this was their patch and we were not welcome. But they were on the other side of the gate and we soon left their barking behind.

Going was slow as my back was playing up, so I had to take rests as the road gently rose. Quite pathetic really, but it did smart.

After ten minutes, the road flattened and we turned off and walked into the wood, and after much slithering, we came upon two areas with about 25 rosettes in each.

At the edge of the wood, there was a low cliff, and below was an orchard, or a "Platt", where they grow the Kent Cob Nut, some kind of domesticated hazelnut, and only found in Kent, apparently.

We walk back to the path and then back down to the car.

I say we would be heading home rather than the pub due to my back, and Ian had stuff on in the afternoon.

On the way back I said we would call in at Mereworth church, which is quite the most wonderfully unusual church in the area, Italianate in design, and painted on the inside with Trompe-l'œil decorations.

It was open, and inside a gentleman was sitting in silence, reading his book and sipping coffee from a thermos.

He greeted me warmly.

Behind him, sun shone through the stained glass in the upper east windows. Quite, quite dazzling. And once I had photographed the rest fo the church, I went and got the big lens to capture the windows and light really close up.

I climb into the car and we drive back tot he motorway, munching in yet another bag of mini cheddars as we go.

It took about an hour to get back, I listen to the football as we go, not a bad day, all in all.

Back home I cook a batch of fritters, they take and hour to prepare and cook, I listen to the football as I work. Norwich had played the evening before, and lost. So Saturday would be punishment as teams around us played and mostly picked up points.

The game's up.

After eating, I watch the evening game, though I can't remember who that was: Citeh v someone. Oh yes, Everton, and Citeh win thanks to some dodgy VAR decisions, as "big" teams seem to.

And that was that.