Friday 27th September 2019

I am not sure if reality has hit home yet. Mum is gone.

I know she is dead, and all that, but there have been no tears. What there has been is sympathy from friends and colleagues on FB.

Which is overwhelming, and almost brought me to tears on a number of occasions.

It turns out we have no phone numbers for Mum's friends, so until I go up to Suffolk on Sunday, I can tell no one. Jools did tell one of mUm's neighbours, so word will be getting out.

It is hard to know what to say to be honest. We had been talking of this day for years, and now it has come. Well.

Jools said Mum's house is a mess, not from what happened on Wednesday, but in general, just untidy and smelly. I think I will have a shock tomorrow. We shall see.

We did not get to sleep until nearly two the night before, and then Mulder brought a very squeaky mouse for us to chase round the house soon after. So sleep was in short supply. We wake at half six, but felt like we needed double that.

Jools went to work, and I stayed at home, trying to process what had happened, and not doing too good a job. I have breakfast, listen to the radio, all very listless.

I do a lot of investigating online, seeing what needs to be done. I make an appointment at the hospital for Monday, then at the registry office for Tuesday.

And then what to do with all the stuff from the house. Not the ornaments and such, but three beds, two sofas, dining room table, larder fridge, TV, hifi? Charities or freecycle I think.

I go shopping, and by then it is time to drop the car off at the port, so that Jools could collect me on the way home from work. She left early, as she was pooped.

I know how she felt.

Later in the afternoon, the doorbells goes, and there is a delivery of flowers. My colleagues sent a fine bunch of flowers for me. I was overwhelmed, so unexpected. I was overcome.

We have chorizo hash for dinner, and i open the bottle of my friend's homebrew to go with it. 11.5% meant it was serious stuff.

We are so shattered, we listen to the radio, but Jools gives in just after seven, and me at eight.

Goodnight.